Twisted Sister Christmas on Broadway 

Twisted Sister is one of the most famous 80’s Glam Rock Bands out there.  How could one possibly pass up, a Twisted Sister Christmas? A show that promised Christmas tunes, laughs, and classic Twisted Sister tunes.  TS’s performance fell nothing short of AWESOME, however getting to it was an adventure in itself.

The show was held on Sunday Dec. 6th in New York City’s Times Square in Nokia Theater.  It was a General Admission show with standing room in the front and stadium seating in the back.  The capacity for this place is 2100 and it seemed to be packed to the rim. The crowd ranged from excited tweens to aging rockers.

Doors opened at 6, and the show was supposed to start at 7,  but NOTHING happened for sometime. A little bit after 8pm, Jim Florentine and Don Jamieson, from “That Metal Show” on VH1 came out to perform “comedy.” By comedy I mean, racist, homophobic, “jokes” about how Asians can’t drive, you shouldn’t wear your seatbelt, how drunk driving is cool, and that they like to bang minors. Class act guys. Not only was it painfully unfunny, they were each on for about 15 minutes and once disapearing from stage it took another 30-45 minutes MORE before Twisted Sister came on, just after 9pm.

For a show that starts at 7, most the audience was a bit livid, shouting things like “we have to work tomorrow!”

Finally when the show started the curtains pulled back and we saw some elves in this rad Santa workshop stage.  Eddie “Fingers” Ojeda, Jay Jay French,  Mark “The Animal” Mendoza,  & A. J. Pero then got on stage followed by three slutty reindeer’s pulling out Santa’s sleigh which had Dee Snider on top in a Santa outfit as they broke into ” Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas.” The audience squealed in delight.  After the first song Snider lost the Santa costume and donned his normal spandex pants apparel, and of course full makeup.

They alternated their play list between Christmas songs and classic Twisted Sister. There were plenty of over enthusiastic drunks bopping around who got entirely too excited when songs like “Burn in Hell” came on. When  piece of equipment fell or needed repair an elf would run out stage to fix it.

During “I’ll be Home for Christmas,” rocker Constantine Maroulis, made a guest appearance and really nailed it. It was highly enjoyable to see him singing with Snider.

At one point an elf came out with a snow machine and was humping the snow out of it. I believe it was during  “I saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus.” The ejaculating elf ran across the stage like mad, dowsing the band and audience members with his special white stuff.

Throughout the show Snider kept disappearing behind the set, presumably for water. It was a tad distracting.  “The Animal”  had some bass issues for a few songs but later returned on stage.

The perhaps most amazing thing about the show was that guitarist Eddie Ojeda, was on stage rocking it out just 4 days after having emergency back surgery. He didn’t appear to be in pain, and played like a champ.

At one point Santa came on stage with no pants on. He asked everyone in the band what they wanted for Christmas, and when he asked Snider he replied that he already had so much to ask for anything else would be selfish…but…. and Santa insisted, which he finally replied ” I WANNA ROCK!” and then broke into that song.

The show was excellent, they were defiantly spry for a band thats been around since the 70’s, still showing the same enthusiasm I imagine they did on tour in the 80’s (when I was still in diapers), engaged the audience in song with them at several points, making it all that much more enjoyable. The only thing I would suggest is ditching the openers and starting on time.

For the encore they sang  their own rendition of the “Twelve Days of Christmas”, called “Heavy Metal Christmas” and then brought out approx. 30 of the FDNY on stage while they sang “We’re not Gonna Take It.” These guys were LOADED, dancing around, like morons, singing into the mics, I was just waiting for one to fall off the stage. It was harmless fun though.

I suggest checking out their album, “A Twisted Christmas” to an alternative to the crap thats out there now.  Available on their site you can download “Come All Ye Faithful” to the tune of  “We’re Not Gonna Take It” for free.

I’d love to have coffee with Dee Snider some day.